


The New Normal

by Brumeier



Category: Misfits of Science
Genre: Animal Transformation, Bingo, Dogs, Gen, Pining, Supernatural Elements, Team Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 07:02:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18751396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brumeier/pseuds/Brumeier
Summary: Billy Hayes was the normal one, the self-appointed leader of the Misfits who helped them work together using their special powers to help others. So what happens when he suddenly becomes less than normal himself?





	The New Normal

**Author's Note:**

> Written for H/C Bingo May Amnesty Challenge: small fandom, unwanted transformation

Billy sat on the metal exam table, staring morosely at the door. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go down. He was the leader, the inspiring force behind the Misfits. The normal one that helped keep the others in check.

“You’re completely healthy,” El said. “Not even a single flea.”

Well, there was some good news.

“How did this happen?” Johnny B asked. He was sitting in Billy’s chair, feet up on Billy’s desk, sunglasses propped up on his forehead. He snapped his fingers and blue tendrils of crackling electricity sparked between them. “Another one of your animal experiments?”

El shook his head. “We didn’t do this. Billy got bit by a dog at the beach yesterday.”

Johnny raised an eyebrow. “Were-dog?”

Billy tried for a sarcastic laugh, but it just came out sounding like _woof_. And sure, he might’ve thought about having a cool power so he could contribute more than just genius ideas and motivational speeches, but turning into a dog? Not even a badass dog, like a Rottweiler. No, he had to turn into a Golden Retriever. The good Samaritan of the dog world.

“I think he’s cute.” Gloria scratched him behind the ears, which felt surprisingly nice. Billy’s tongue lolled out.

“The real question is how long he’ll stay this way.” El squatted down, folding his seven-foot four-inch frame so he could look Billy in the eyes. “Have you tried changing back? I mean, really concentrate.”

 _You really think I haven’t tried that?_ Billy tried to say. It came out like a growl. _You think I want to be running around on all fours? Do you have any idea how many smells there are in here? Let me tell you, El, they are_ not _good smells._

“You know anyone who speaks dog?” Johnny asked. Billy didn’t appreciate the level of humor he was finding in the situation.

 _We have to find that dog_ , Billy tried to say.

“I think we need to find the dog that bit him,” El said. “Bring him back here to the lab for some tests.”

Billy barked his approval.

“Time for a little beach blanket bingo,” Johnny said. The sunglasses dropped back over his eyes. “Let’s bolt.”

They dodged Miss Nance, who had the usual long list of phone messages, and managed to get to the parking lot without Richard seeing them. He would _not_ understand about the dog thing. Billy hopped up in the driver’s seat of the ice cream truck and put his paws on the wheel.

_Oh, man. This won’t work._

“Get in the back, Fido,” Johnny said. Billy growled at him and moved to the passenger seat. No way he was riding in the back.

El drove them to the house he and Billy shared; the only way they could afford to live right on the beach was to split the rent. Billy bounded out of the truck and ran around excitedly. The smells around his house were familiar.

“Focus, Billy,” El said. “Can you pick up the scent of the other dog? The one that bit you?”

How could he possibly focus when he was smelling last night’s slightly-charred burgers, and popcorn, and El’s fabric softener, and whatever was slowly rotting in the garbage?

Gloria squatted down in front of him. “Hey, Billy. Can you find the dog? That’s a good boy. Go find the dog!”

“Yeah, go fetch,” Johnny added, and mimed throwing a ball.

Billy ran through Johnny’s legs and sent him sprawling in the sand. _Who’s laughing now, B-man? Also, who wears a leather jacket to the beach?_

But Billy got back on the job. He didn’t want to be a dog forever. He hit the beach, nose in the air. So many smells! Suntan lotion, sweat, ice cream, saltwater…how did dogs get through a day with such a thick stew of smells to deal with?

There were plenty of dog scents. Big dogs, small dogs, but not the right dog. What Billy _did_ find were gorgeous women in bikinis who wanted to pet him and coo over him, and he was just fine with that. Why had he never realized what babe magnets dogs were?

“Billy?”

 _Busted!_ There was Jane, beautiful Jane who was always almost within reach but still somehow untouchable. Jane, who was carrying her ex-husband’s baby. Jane, who Billy wanted more than any of the nubile beach bunnies who’d come to give him pets. Now she was the only normal one.

“Is that you, Hayes?” she asked again. “How typical to have women fawning all over you.”

“Is this your dog?” one of the beach bunnies asked. “He’s so cute!”

“He’s got distemper,” Jane replied sourly. “I’d watch yourself.”

Billy got down on his belly and whimpered. How was he ever going to have a chance with Jane if he was a dog? It was a cruel, cruel universe.

 _Jane! It’s not what you think!_ “I can explain!”

Jane’s eyebrows rose so high they almost disappeared, and her cheeks flushed pink. At the same time, Billy realized he’d spoken aloud. And that he was on all fours in the sand. Naked.

“There’s something I can never un-see,” Johnny said.

Luckily El was there, quickly divesting himself of his button-down shirt and draping it over Billy. 

“Now you know how I feel all the time,” he said. The tallest Misfit, he could shrink himself down to Ken doll size. His clothes didn’t change size with him, so sometimes complete strangers found themselves confronted by a seven-foot-tall naked black man. It was a good conversation starter.

Billy got to his feet, tying El’s shirt around his waist like a sarong.

“Does this mean you’re back to normal?” Gloria asked.

Billy took a moment to do a self-evaluation. “I don’t think so? I still feel weird.”

“Any urge to chase a car?” Johnny asked with a smirk.

“We need to run some tests,” El said. “And find that dog before –”

 _Found it!_ Billy was off and running before he even realized he’d transformed again, El’s shirt flapping around his belly.

“My shirt!”

“Billy!”

“Gloria, stop him!”

Billy ran, but suddenly his paws weren’t touching the ground anymore. He was hovering just over the sand, legs churning but going nowhere. Before he knew it, a collar was sliding over his head and he heard the snick of a leash being clipped into place.

_Okay, this is kinky, even for you guys. When did you even have time to get a collar?_

“We’ll find him together,” Gloria admonished, leash in hand. She released her mental hold on him. Telekinesis. Now there was a super power that made more sense.

Being a dog was more trouble than it was worth. Lucky for him, then, that he had his Misfits family at his side. When they worked together there was nothing they couldn’t accomplish. Including finding a way to turn him back into a person. Permanently.

_Follow me, guys! I’m on the scent!_

**Author's Note:**

>  **AN:** When I read that this month’s amnesty challenge was for a small fandom, this is the first one that popped into my head. I was a huge, huge fan of this show back in the day (1985, when I was about 13). I lived for each ep. I cut pictures out of TV Guide. I wrote to Mark Thomas Miller (Johnny B) and he sent me back an autographed picture. I grieved when Dean Paul Martin (Billy) died prematurely when his plane crashed. I will never not love this fandom.


End file.
